The parsha starts off:

דבר אל בני ישראל ויקחו לי תרומה

The מפרשים all ask: why does it say ויקחו they should take, and not ויתנו,they should give?

The מדרש רבה says: אמר הקב”ה לישראל מכרתי לכם תורתי כביכול נמכרתי עמה. The מדרש is saying that הקב”ה is כביכול saying that He is given together with the תורה, and that by living a life of תורה, we are taking the רבונו של עולם with us. The מדרש continues with a famous משל of a king who married off his only daughter and told his new son in law” make me a room to stay in, wherever you go with my daughter.” So too the רבונו של עולם wants to be with us as we follow the תורה.

This explains the word ויקחו- we are so to speak taking הקב”ה with us in the building of the משכן.

This is true for the physical משכן, but its also true for the spiritual משכן as well, as חז”ל say, ועשו לי מקדש ושכנתי בתוכם-בתוך כל אחד מישראל The רבונו של עולם dwells inside of us as long as we’re willing to allow him in.

And that is the עבודה of a Yid, to remember to take Hashem with him in his daily life. How do we take Hashem with us?

on the Passuk אחרי ה’ אלוקיכם תלכון it says in חז”ל

-מה הוא רחום וחנון אף אתה הוי רחום וחנון

To follow Hashem means to emulate his giving ways in our daily conduct. Indeed we are told that שלשה סימנים יש באומה זו רחמנים, ביישנים וגומלי חסדים These are the integral traits of כלל ישראל.

The אור החיים הקדוש points out that in the order of the donations given to the משכן, the אבני שוהם and אבני מילואים are listed last, even though they were the most valuable of all the donations. He explains; חז”ל say that the ענני הכבוד brought the אבנים to the doorsteps of the נשיאים. Since there was no effort involved in acquiring it and donating it, it’s listed last in order. What’s most important in the eyes of the רבונו של עולם is the effort and difficulty involved in giving, not in what was given. As the פסוק says מאת כל אשר ידבנו לבו It’s the heart that matters.

And giving goes beyond just charity. The פסוק in משלי says כבד את ה’ מהונך, To which חז”ל say; מכל מה שחננך There are many ways to give. It can be helping out, or a kind word. And this too is included in the idea of taking Hashem with us in our daily life, and living a life of ועשו לי מקדש ושכנתי בתוכם

We’ll conclude with a powerful story told over by Harav Zev Smith שליט”א who heard it directly from the source. He had spoken in Chicago and after the speech was approached by a woman who told him her personal story. Several years earlier she had gotten a terrible diagnosis ר”ל. Still in a state of shock, and unable to prepare supper, she took her kids to the pizza shop. After sitting with her kids as they ate, she got up to leave, when a woman she did not know approached her and said. “I’ve been watching you engage with your kids. You’re a wonderful mother, and may you be Gebenched!” She told Rav Smith that it’s that comment by a random stranger that kept her going through the next 2 plus years of difficult treatments and pain.

We never know what impact our postive words may have.

May we merit taking the רבונו של עולם with us in all that we do and always follow in His ways.

In this week’s Parshas we read about מתן תורה. The Parsha also starts off with the story of Yisro and his eventual גירות. Why was יתרו given such prominence in the Parsha of מתן תורה?

The 1st of the עשרת הדברות says: אנכי ה’ אלוקיך אשר הוצאתיך מארץ מצרים

The Mifarshim ask why does it not say אנכי ה’ אשר בראתי שמים וארץ?

Sefer Nesivos Shalom explains that at מתן תורה there were 2 major events. Hashem revealed Himself to the world, and also that He chose Klal Yisrael to be his nation. These 2 monumental events go together, as Hashem so to speak tied Himself to us, the עם הנבחר. And that is why the Torah emphasizes אלוקיך אשר הוצאתיך מארץ מצרים

Not only am I Hashem, but I’m also אלוקיך, and the purpose of יציאת מצרים was for this, that you should become My nation. It is with this understanding that we can also explain the famous מדרש:

בשעה שנתן ה’ תורה צפור לא צייץ, עוף לא פרח. All of nature went quite at the great moment. Since a new reality was being created. A new world in which there would be a nation of Klal Yisrael. And so rhe old world of nature had to be silent. Rashi says at the beginning of the Parsha

: מה שמועה שמע ובא? קריעת ים סוף ומלחמת עמלק.

Yisro was inspired by these 2 stories of rescue. In both Klal Yisrael was under attack by nations of the world, and in both they miraculously emerged safely. So Yisro sees the great contrast between Klal Yisrael and the אומות העולם and has a desire to become part of us. The Rambam writes that a גוי can be מחסידי אומות העולם and merit עולם הבא by just keeping the שבע מצוות בני נח. Yet, Yisro chose to go all in and join us. And till today, many choose to go all in and to become a part of Klal Yisrael by being גרים. This is often done with much מסירות נפש, at great personal sacrifice. Yet these heroes choose to become part of the עם הנבחר as they understand the true greatness of Klal Yisral.

There is a well known גר צדק living today in Tzfas. His name is Rabbi Nattan Gamedze. He is from a prominent African family who found his way to Yiddishkeit. He notes that its not always easy being a man of color while living a Chariedi lifestyle. Nonetheless when asked why he chose to become a Jew he responds: ואני קרבת אלוקים לי טוב The special connection that I have to Hashem by being a Jew makes it all well worth it.

We can now understand why Yisro is given such prominence in the Parsha. He understood the greatness of Klal Yisrael which is the theme of מתן תורה and his story is the story of the Parsha.

We’ll conclude with a beautiful true story told over by Rav Azreal Tauber זצ”ל. He had founded a well known Bais Din in Monsey called Machon L’Horaah. The Dayanim were officiating by the גרות of a young woman. Just prior to her טבילה, the Dayanim reminded her that she can still back out. “It’s not easy being a Yid, and it’s even harder being a convert.” They then went through a litany of reasons why life as a Jew will be much more complicated. The young woman replied: ” You’re telling me all these reasons why my life will be much harder if I become a Yid. But none of that is a concern to me, since I have 1 goal in mind. I want to become Hashem’s child!!”

May we all merit to appreciate the greatness of being Hashem’s children!

The Greatness of Klal Yisrael-and Stories of Those Who Decided to Join Us

https://anchor.fm/shalom-tyberg123/episodes/Parshas-Yisro–Becoming-Hashems-Nation-e1d85jq

Lessons From the Parsha on Making and Keeping a Healthy Marriage.

We’re holding by פרשת בשלח, Chazal tell us: בכל דור ודור חייב אדם לראות עצמו כאלו הוא יצא ממצרים

Leaving מצרים was not a one time event but an ongoing process. And this includes קריעת ים סוף which we read about in the Parsha. The Gemara says:

קשה לזווגן כקריעת ים סוף

In our times we unfortunately have a clear understanding of this as we grapple with the phenomenon known as the Shidduch crisis, where there is a multitude of girls who are Frum, Ehrlich, and accomplished that are sitting at home and waiting for their זווג. Harav Ahron Leib Steinman זצ”ל once related that there are two things that cause him to not fall asleep at night: couples who don’t have kids and single girls who haven’t found their zivug.

On Chol Hamoed Pesach 2018, there was a horrific crash that took the lives of a chosson and kallah, Yisrael Levin and Elisheva Kaplan. At the levia R Shaya Levin, Yisrael’s father said: Hashem, I’m giving You back your afikoman, but I’m asking for something in return. Please give 10,000 shidduchim to klal yisrael. Inspired by that, a wonderful organization was founded called 10K batai yisrael, with the idea being that you don’t need to be a professional shadchan to make a shidduch, anybody can, a friend, neighbor or relative. All you need to do us pick up the phone and call. To date, over 16,000 suggestions have been made through their efforts, and over 200 marriages of older singles have been celebrated. Many older singles only get one or 2 dates a year, and when you call them with a suggestion it brings them tremendous chizuk. We shouldn’t be concerned about the results, we just need to try. R Yisrael Salanter used to say א מענטש דארפט טאהן, נישט אופטון. In any manner of Klal work, a person has to do, not necessarily see results.

Another way in which we can help our older singles is by Davening for them. When you ask a single girl or boy for their name for Davening you are also giving them much needed Chizuk, and as we know, the תפלות of Klal Yisrael are answered in שמים.

And of course, by קריעת ים סוף, the water split and remained in that position as Klal Yisrael passed through. It’s not enough to get married, but one needs to constantly put in efforts into his marriage, making sure it stays a vibrant and healthy relationship. This can only happen when both husband and wife spend quality time together away from household chores and burdens. Rabbi Benzion Shaffier tells about his Rosh Yeshiva Harav Henoch Leibowitz, who got up at his wife’s לוויה and said, “Everything we did, we did together. We built the Yeshiva together, we traveled together, We grew together.” When a couple shares their life with each other, it helps create an ongoing and lasting bond.

Finally, we must mention recent events in Israel. While much has been said about the need to protect our children and stand behind the victims of abuse there’s another crucial lesson which many Rabanim have been speaking about. The תורה says that Klal Yisrael are an עם חכם ונבון There’s a Hebrew expression, what’s the difference between a פקח, a clever person, and a חכם, a wise person? The פקח knows how to extract himself from difficult situations, but the חכם knows how not to get into those situations to begin with! Chazal helped us live a healthy lifestyle by establishing the rules of יחוד. When a person lives with healthy boundaries as established by חז”ל he keeps himself out of trouble. As the Pasuk says והמים להם חומה מימינם ומשמאלם The waters were walls around them, and we too need to establish healthy boundaries in our relationships. By doing so we will also strengthen our own marriages, and bring קדושה into our homes.

We’ll conclude with a true story recently published in Hamodia. The administrator of Krasna Yeshiva in Boro Park received a phone call from his banker, stating that there was an email request coming from his secretary to transfer $180000 to an account in Brazil. “Did you authorize this transaction?” The administrator said “absolutely not!” It’s an attempted fraud.The banker then explained what made him hold off the transaction. “Everything looked in order in the email and I almost went ahead with the transfer, but at the last minute I noticed that your secretary addressed you by your 1st name. All the years I’ve been working with your Yeshiva, you were always adressed as Mr, and not by your 1st name. That’s what made me suspicious, and so I called to confirm.” By maintaining healthy boundaries around us may we all merit much ברכה in our lives!

Parshas Bo

In this week’s Parsha we read how Klal Yisrael is finally sent out of Mitzrayim, following Makkas Bechoros, as the Possuk says:

ויקרא למשה ולאהרן לילה ויאמר קומו צאו מתוך עמי

Paroah begged Klal Yisrael to leave Mitzrayim! This was as a result of the 10 Makkos when Mitzrayim and Paroah saw the Yad Hashem and realized that they were powerless in its face.  We have to understand; why was it necessary to bring 10 Makkos to see Yad Hashem, Hashem could have started with Makkos Bechoros and that would have been enough for Mitzrayim to send them out?

We can find a clue to answer this question from the beginning of this Parsha. The Possuk says:

ולמען תספר באזני בנך ובן בנך את אשר התעללתי במצרים

For all generations Klal Yisreal will be  telling the story of the 10 Makkos. By talking about these miracles we come to the realization that there’s an Aibishter who controls everything. So whether it’s controlling the water as we see by Dom, controlling the earth by Kinnim, controlling the animals as seen in Aruv and Dever, the air as seen Choshech or human life as seen by Makos Bechoros, the 10 Makkos show us that Hashem is in charge. And so that is the point of having 10 Makkos, to glorify Hashem’s name and strengthen our Emunah for all generations by witnessing and talking about these Miracles.

Rav Yaakov Kaminetzky asks; we find that for the 1^st few Makkos, The Chartumim could copy them and thus Paroah was not impressed by it. Why is that today we don’t hear about real magic being performed, and while there is a huge industry of magicians nowadays, we all know that it’s all illusions and not real. So why was it once real, and not today? We also find that in Chazal’s time there were creatures known as Shaidim, which were real forces, demons which they saw. Why are these creatures not seen today?

Explains Rav Yaakov, based on the possuk in Koheles :

זה לעומת זה עשה אלוקים

Everything in creation is balanced, so whatever exists in Kedusha exacts also in Tumah., This is necessary so there will be free will in the world, so everything is balanced, and a person has a choice to make. When the Koach of Kedusha was great and there were נביאים, there had to exist a counter balance, something on the opposing side of Tumah so there will be free will in the world, so that, is why real magic, existed in that period. As the generations went down and Nevua disappeared, so too did real magic. In Chazal’s time, there was no Nevuah but there was something known as a Bas Kol a heavenly voice which we read about often. To counter this there were Sheidim, forces of Tumah, and gradually as Kedusha went down those too disappeared. In 1909 the Chafetz Chaim was involved in removing a Dibbuk, a spirit who possessed a young girl. His Talmid, Rav Elchonon Wasserman said that this would be the last Dibbuk to appear, as a giant like the Chofetz Chaim would never be again, so with less Kedusha there will be less Tumah as well.

But being that nowadays we don’t see open Nissim how then do we strengthen our Emunah? The Ramban writes at the end of the Parsha, that we do that by recounting the Miracles of יציאת מצרים through the many Mitzvos we fulfill. This is done daily through Tefillin and Mezuza as well as saying Shema, as well as the Yomim Tovim of Pesach, and Sukkos. By remembering those great Nisim and retelling them to our children we are strengthening our Emunah in Hashem and always reminding ourselves that, whether we see it openly or not, Hashem is always there and watching us.

Rav Yisrael Salanter would frequent an inn during his travels. The proprietor was a G-d fearing Yid. Yet, on one of his stays by the inn, R’ Yisrael noted that the inn keeper was being lax in his Mitzva observance. Upon inquiry, he told R’ Yisrael that some weeks prior, a Maskil, a secular Jew had stayed at the inn and challenged the inn keepers Emunah, by eating non-kosher food. “If there’s a G-d,” said the guest, “Let him punish me for eating this food.” Indeed he ate it, and nothing happened. This incident caused the inn keeper to doubt his Emunah. R’ Yisrael did not say anything in response. Sometime later he approached the inn keepers daughter. “I heard that you are a talented musician, can you please play a number for me?” The daughter refused on the grounds that she was busy at the time. Responded R’ Yisrael “How then do I know that you can actually play music? Maybe you made it up?” The girl pointed to her diploma hanging on the wall.” That paper is proof that I am a talented musician. I proved myself in school, and that is enough.” R’ Yisrael turned to her father, the inn keeper, and said: “ Just like your daughter does not need to prove again that she can play music, so too Hashem already proved himself in Mitzrayim to the whole world. He does not need to prove it again. “

By remembering and internalizing the story of יציאת מצרים, may we all merit strengthening our Emunah each and every day.

Understanding How פרעה Seemed to Lose His Power of בחירה

The Destructive Force of Anger

In this Parsha we read about the first 7 of the 10 Makkos. By מכת צפרדע, it says “ותעל הצפרדע” which is לשון יחיד-singular. Rashi explains that it was a lone frog that emerged from the Nile. But when the Egyptians saw it, they hit it again and again, causing it to split into swarms and swarms of frogs, until the entire land was inundated. The Steipler in his Sefer on Chumash ברכת פרץ, asks: Once the Egyptians realized that by hitting the frog they are causing it to split into more and more frogs, why did they continue hitting it? Answers the Steipler, this shows us the destructive force of anger. The Egyptians were so infuriated by the frog, that they hit it. And even though it started to multiply as they struck it, they couldn’t control themselves, and continued hitting, to their own detriment. When a person loses himself to anger, he is no longer governed by any sense of rational, and is fully controlled by his emotions. This to often leads a person to actions and words he later regrets, but at the time of heightened emotions, simply cannot control. Acting on impulse ends up harming a person. May we merit to always act with with calmness and rationality.

Chumash Shemos introduces a new entity. Up until now, we learned about The Avos and their families. We are now introduced to בני ישראל- The nation of Klal Yisrael. The Rambam writes that Paroah is also a reference to the יצר הרע, Mitzrayim is a reference to the body of a person, and Moshe is a reference to the Neshamah. As such, we can certainly look to gain lessons from The Parsha on how to confront the Paraoh in our own lives.

The Pasuk says : ויאמר אל עמו הנה עם בני ישראל רב ועצום ממנו, הבה נתחכמה לו

Paroah decides to trick Klal Yisrael into becoming slaves. As the Pasuk later says ” ויעבידו מצרים את מי ישראל בפרך” To which Chazal say בפה רך. They used trickery to cause to start working by stating that it was a patriotic duty to help build fortified cities, and it was only after Klal Yisrael joined did the Egyptians stop working and told the Jews : Now you have to continue working as slaves. This was the way Paroah tricked Klal Yisrael into becoming slaves. And The Yetzer Hara works is such ways as well. He tricks a person into falling by painting a false picture. And it’s our job to avoid that entrapment. Today on social media platforms such as Instagram you can follow a persons day and life, and see all their daily activities. You can see pictures of where they go out to eat, what they shop for, where they vacation etc. This leads to confusion and envy, and causes people to want to copy that lifestyle. This causes people to spend money they don’t have to copy their neighbors and leads to many problems, such as going into debt, Shalom Bayis problems and the like. This is the trickery of Paroah and his spiritual descendant the Yetzer Hara. The Yidishe way is Hatzanay Leches. What you do is your business, nobody else business, and should not make a difference on how I live my life. We need to stay away from Paroah trickery and not fall into the trap of הבה נתחכמה לו.

This leads to another strategy of Paroah. When Moshe and Aharon come to Paroah for the 1st time and demand he let Klal Yisrael go and serve Hashem Paraoh decides that the way to stop any thoughts of leaving is to make the work even harder for the Jews. And so Paroah states: תכבד העבודה על האנשים, let the work become even harder, so they will have no time to think about leaving. The מסילת ישרים writes that the Yetzer Hara works in the same way like Paroah; he gets a person caught up in daily life such as work and making money that he no longer has time to think about the important things in life. No time to make a חשבון הנפש, where am I heading in life? Is this the life I envisioned for myself when I was growing up? Am I heading in the right direction in important manners of life, or am I caught up in the minutia of life and forgetting about my spiritual aspirations? These are questions each Yid needs to think about from time to time, and the Yetzer doesn’t want him to ask them. So he gets a person distracted by a million different things so he won’t have time to think, similar to what Paroah did. And it’s our job to try and avoid that trickery of the Yetzer Hara and allow ourselves the time and space to reflect on who we are and where we’re heading in life.

Finally, there’s one more trickery of Paroah we need to avoid. A slave does not have an identity, rather he’s just a number, who’s fully subjugated to his master. And that was certainly part of what Paroah had in mind; to take away the individuality of each Yid by enslaving them. Yet we know that each person has his unique roll in life, which no one can take away. And the Torah eludes to this at the begining of the Parsha ואלה שמות בני ישראל, as Rashi points out “להודיע חבתן שנמשלו לכוכבים” Klal Yisrael are like shining stars, each with its unique roll. The Yetzer Hara too, tries to bring a person down by telling him he’s just a number among the thousands who are just are like him. But the Torah reminds us; No! You’re not a number, but a precious star whom Hashem cherishes and loves.

We’ll conclude with a story. A young Bachur in Lakewood was feeling that he wasn’t remarkable in any way, and lost his desire to learn. Instead of learning night Seder in Yeshiva, he went to a local assisted living facility and sat in the lounge with the local residents, watching television. After many nights sitting in the lounge, an elderly resident approached him and asked why he’s there watching television and not in Yeshiva? The boy replied that he feels he’s just a number, not an individual and has no drive to learn. The man rolled up his sleeve to reveal the tattooed number on his arm. ” The Germans wanted us to feel like numbers. But, no, you’re not a number. You’re a unique individual who can accomplish in life.” The young man took the words to heart and went back to Yeshiva. And that is a lesson we can all learn; not to be caught up in the trickery of Paroah and the Yetzer Hara, remember who we are and remember that we each have our own unique roll in life.

In this week’s Parsha we read how Klal Yisrael is finally sent out of Mitzrayim, following Makkas Bechoros, as the Possuk says:

ויקרא למשה ולאהרן לילה ויאמר קומו צאו מתוך עמי

Paroah begged Klall Yisrael to leave Mitzrayim! And this was the result of the 10 Makkos when Mitzrayim and Paroah saw the Yad Hashem and realized that they were powerless in its face.  We have to understand; why was it necessary to bring 10 Makkos to see Yad Hashem, Hashem could have started with Makkos Bechoros and that would have been enough for Mitzrayim to send them out?

We can find a clue to answer this question from the beginning of this Parsha. The Possuk says:

ולמען תספר באזני בנך ובן בנך את אשר התעללתי במצרים

For all generations Klal Yisreal will be  telling the story of the 10 Makkos. By talking about these miracles we come to the realization that there’s an Aibishter who controls everything. So whether it’s controlling the water as we see by Dom, controlling the earth by Kinnim, controlling the animals as seen in Aruv and Dever, the air as seen Choshech or human life as seen by Makos Bechoros, the 10 Makkos show us that Hashem is in charge. And so that is the point of having 10 Makkos, to glorify Hashem’s name and strengthen our Emunah for all generations by witnessing and talking about these Miracles.

Rav Yaakov Kaminetzky asks; we find that for the 1^st few Makkos, The Chartumim could copy them and thus Paroah was not impressed by it. Why is that today we don’t hear about real magic being performed, and while there is a huge industry of magicians nowadays, we all know that it’s all illusions and not real. So why was it once real, and not today? We also find that in Chazal’s time there were creatures known as Shaidim, which were real forces, demons which they saw. Why are these creatures not seen today?

Explains Rav Yaakov, based on the possuk in Koheles :

זה לעומת זה עשה אלוקים

Everything in creation is balanced, so whatever exists in Kedusha exacts also in Tumah., This is necessary so there will be free will in the world, so everything is balanced, and a person has a choice to make. When the Koach of Kedusha was great and there were נביאים, there had to exist a counter balance, something on the opposing side of Tumah so there will be free will in the world, so that, is why real magic, existed in that period. As the generations went down and Nevua disappeared, so too did real magic. In Chazal’s time, there was no Nevuah but there was something known as a Bas Kol a heavenly voice which we read about often. To counter this there were Sheidim, forces of Tumah, and gradually as Kedusha went down those too disappeared. In 1909 the Chafetz Chaim was involved in removing a Dibbuk, a spirit who possessed a young girl. His Talmid, Rav Elchonon Wasserman said that this would be the last Dibbuk to appear, as a giant like the Chofetz Chaim would never be again, so with less Kedusha there will be less Tumah as well.

But being that nowadays we don’t see open Nissim how then do we strengthen our Emunah? The Ramban writes at the end of the Parsha, that we do that by recounting the Miracles of through the many Mitzvos we fulfill. This is done daily through Tefillin and Mezuza as well as saying Shema, as well as the Yomim Tovim of Pesach, and Sukkos. By remembering those great Nisim and retelling them to our children we are strengthening our Emunah in Hashem and always reminding ourselves that, whether we see it openly or not, Hashem is always there and watching us.

Rav Yisrael Salanter would frequent an inn during his travels. The proprietor was a G-d fearing Yid. Yet, on one of his stays by the inn, R’ Yisrael noted that the inn keeper was being lax in his Mitzva observance. Upon inquiry, he told R’ Yisrael that some weeks prior, a Maskil, a secular Jew had stayed at the inn and challenged the inn keepers Emunah, by eating non-kosher food. “If there’s a G-d,” said the guest, “Let him punish me for eating this food.” Indeed he ate it, and nothing happened. This incident caused the inn keeper to doubt his Emunah. R’ Yisrael did not say anything in response. Sometime later he approached the inn keepers daughter. “I heard that you are a talented musician, can you please play a number for me?” The daughter refused on the grounds that she was busy at the time. Responded R’ Yisrael “How then do I know that you can actually play music? Maybe you made it up?” The girl pointed to her diploma hanging on the wall.” That paper is proof that I am a talented musician. I proved myself in school, and that is enough.” R’ Yisrael turned to her father, the inn keeper, and said: “ Just like your daughter does not need to prove again that she can play music, so too Hashem already proved himself in Mitzrayim to the whole world. He does not need to prove it again. “

By remembering and internalizing the story of יציאת מצרים, may we all merit strengthening our Emunah each and every day.